Mean Girls in the Workplace- How to Survive and Thrive

New Book Confidence Slayers: Fragile Souls by Dr. Cassandra Smith Provides Valuable Insights into Confidence Slayer Attributes and How to Regain Workplace Confidence


Recently Kevin Price, Host of the nationally syndicated Price of Business Show, welcomed Dr. Cassandra McBride-Smith to provide another commentary in a series.

The Dr. Cassandra McBride-Smith Commentaries

We’ve all heard the bullying stories on social media, a breeding ground for confidence slayers, also known as trolls; the meanspirited, hateful, plain evil remarks people post make me wonder about their upbringing, self-efficacy, and their confidence. I also wonder, how do confidence slayers do their jobs so well?

In a time where vitriol is common, how do we gain respect when engaging with others or at least not succumb to the negativity that so easily besets and surrounds us? How do confidence slayers targets easily succumb to the slayers? I sought to answer many questions about confidence hits and the slayer impacts! Some of the brutal words and actions alter the confidence slayers targets’ moods and/or take years to recover from, dig out from the low place.  It seems women-on-women confidence slayers scenarios saturate the workforce. Historically, men have dominated business environments and women have fewer opportunities for career progression. Although this has improved, you would think that now if we have more seats at the table, we’d rally and support each other. This is not always the case.

I share a story about working for an airline in my book where women in C-suite roles were acting more like spiteful girls in high school than educated women. I’m being generous as high school students probably wouldn’t behave as such.  Backbiting, gaslighting by not including other women in important meetings, pitting against other coworkers, calling out others’ inadequacies—you name it, and in the most strident way.

Aside from fear, we can reason that the poorest behavior against others in these types of scenarios is rooted in fear; I heard someone say that the attempts to hold others back are fixed in the person not thinking there is enough to go around – the mindset that if you get acknowledged, blessed, a profit, then it won’t be enough for me. That is ludicrous! It is a big world with a lot of talented people created to problem-solve, invent, support, and create. Selfishness and power-thirsting behaviors deplete resources.

Here’s a training tip:

Leaders complete a confidence slayers survey. You can use the example in my book and/or do a skip-level meeting. The skip-level meeting is with your direct reports’ team members. Check-in to see what is happening with the employee and his/her manager or employee-to-employee unmanageable conflict. One step in the right direction can change the trajectory of your people engagement, your biggest resource!

McBride & Smith Training Advisory Group offers employee engagement training. We implement simple ways to train busy adults in the workforce based on adult learning principles.

For help with training, visit

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